Job appraisals

Have you ever wondered what they really meant at your job appraisal? Here's an a - z list of common performance appraisal terms and their meaning:-

• Active socially: Drinks heavily.
• Alert to company developments: An office gossip.
• Approaches difficult problems with logic: Finds someone else to do the job.
• Average: Not too bright.
• Character above reproach: One step ahead of the law.
• Competent: Is able to get work done if supervisor helps.
• Conscientious and careful: Scared.
• Consults with superiors often: A pain in the butt.
• Demonstrates qualities of leadership: Has a loud voice.
• Deserves promotion: Create new title to make him or her feel appreciated.
• Enjoys job: Needs more to do.
• Exceptionally well qualified: Has committed no major blunders to date.
• Expresses self well: Can string two sentences together.
• Gets along extremely well with superiors and subordinates alike: A coward.
• Happy: Paid too much.
• Hard worker: Does it the hard way.
• Indifferent to instruction: Knows more than superiors.
• Is unusually loyal: no one else wants them.
• Judgment is usually sound: Lucky.
• Keen analyst: Thoroughly confused.
• Keen sense of humour: Knows lots of dirty jokes.
• Maintains professional attitude: A snob.
• Meticulous in attention to detail: A nitpicker.
• Not a desk person: Did not go to college.
• Of great value to the organisation: Turns in work on time.
• Quick thinking: Offers plausible excuses for errors.
• Slightly below average: Stupid.
• Spends extra hours on the job: Miserable home life.
• Strong adherence to principles: Stubborn.
• Tactful in dealing with superiors: Knows when to keep his mouth shut.
• Takes advantage of every opportunity to progress: Buys drinks for superiors.
• Takes pride in work: Conceited.
• Uses resources well: Delegates everything.
• Uses time effectively: Clock watcher.
• Very creative: Keeps finding reasons to do anything except original work.
• Will go far: Relative of management.
• Zealous attitude: Opinionated